Woofaboomus
Born: Scott Sherman Maddix,
Rumford, Maine, January 19, 1970
Attended Oxford Hills High School (now Oxford Hills Comprehensive High School) in South Paris, Maine until '89--long before they got this.
Attended one year at University of Southern Maine in '89-'90-- colossal waste of time and money.
After too many pointless jobs and near-homelessness for over a year, attended Berkshire Institute for Christian Studies '91-'92, graduated second in class with a certificate (suitable for framing) in Bible Studies. Course included a three-week trip to the Bible lands: Egypt, Jordan and Israel. It was during this time that I became enamored of the poetry of Gerard Manley Hopkins, and the writings of C.S. Lewis, J.R.R. Tolkein and George MacDonald -- fantasy writers. These men gave me hope that being Christian did not mean being slow-witted and mundane.
In 1993 an elder of the church I was attending in the Berkshires told me he'd been troubled by dreams of my joining the Navy. A pacifist from way back, I told him I'd think about it, but planned to just let it lie. Over time he kept having the dreams and I promised to at least go talk to the recruiter. Originally, I thought in terms of what I would get out of the Navy, but by the time I went to the recruiter I had decided to look at it (I swear) as a matter of what God wanted from me.
Well, I signed up and in October entered Boot Camp in Great Lakes, Ill. -- ugh. In January, I was sent to Indiana to the Defense Information School (DINFOS) to learn to become a military journalist and graduated Top Broadcaster in my class. The school has since moved to For Meade, Maryland.
At DINFOS I learned many skills: reporting, editing, layout, photography, dee-jaying, video editing, sound editing, directing, anchoring, camera operation, scriptwriting, and on and on and on. About nine months of school and 23 credits -- at the moment none of them transfer, but I'm sure that's an oversight and I plan to appeal.
The Navy then sent me to San Diego where I was stationed on the USS Tarawa (LHA 1) -- an amphibious assault ship, large enough to hold over three thousand Sailors and Marines when deployed. During my stay on the Tarawa I traveled to the Gulf -- I was too late to experience Desert Storm, but was lucky (?) enough to be there for Desert Strike (about this time I kept a diary on the office computer. Click here for excerpts). I earned a silly ribbon for being there, and got to visit Jordan again. Since I traveled east to get there the first time and west to get there this time, I figure this means I've been around the world at least twice.
And Oh, my God it was hot.
While I was in the Navy a friend from BICS died in an accident, and this caused me to rethink my worldview with regard to God and religion. It seemed to me at the time that this friend, Ai by name, had a huge gift from God and a great faith. He fervently desired to use his art to spread the Word and do good, and when he fell into a coma following the accident I thought to myself, "see, God will use this to prove himself, and Ai will wake up stronger, and those around him will have renewed faith, and the gift God gave him will be used for God's work. It's all very simply a matter of making best use of things -- God wouldn't waste a soul like Ai before he gets a chance to use his gift." Ai's death came as a shock, and I never really recovered.
Of course, if I weren't already drifting I would have stood strong, but I have always been rather Pagan in outlook, and I feel that's my natural state. So at this point I decided, at least for a while, to experiment with being True to Myself. This meant not feeling guilty about my sexual attractions, nor my interest in the occult, but embracing all the things that make me ME.
Almost immediately I started running into like-minded people, and I started experimenting with both sex and magic, and it felt like coming home.
In time I started a Wiccan circle aboard Tarawa with the help and approval of the ship's chaplain, a helluva guy. My story Sea Witches is/will be based roughly on my experiences at this time.
In addition to regaining my spiritual path and sexual reality, I began more and more to feel the burden of my pacifism. My time in the Navy was an orgy of repression, to the point where I felt I was becoming two separate people -- and since Wicca teaches self-definition and empowerment, I decided to take the step of leaving the Navy and becoming a conscientious objector. This is tough, let me tell you. Following is an excerpt from my journal:
When I joined the Navy, I joined it in good faith. If I lied to anyone, it was only myself.
Today, I am a Wiccan, a return to my Pagan roots, and should be a conscientious objector--but when I joined I was a fundy, full sure it was where I would spend the rest of my days.
Now I am Gay, as I always have been, and should be excluded--but when I joined I had accepted the sacrifice of celibacy, what I thought was the only solution, since a miraculous healing seemed not forthcoming.
I have returned to myself, and find my daily time aboard Tarawa to be an increasingly unbearable chore, a time when I must be someone and something I am not. At present, duty alone keeps me here--but for how much longer will that be enough? (end of April '97)
and another:
May 27--I'm waiting in the chaplain's office--he's stepped out, and I'm waiting for his return. I am looking at the package for separation by reason of conscientious objection. It involves letters, interviews and a hearing, and he (Father Fix) says it will take about a month. Goddess, I hope I'm doing the right thing! Pray I can find a good job and get into school! "I ain't gonna study war no more/I ain't gonna study war/Come on down, everybody sing/I ain't gonna study war."
and then:
08OCTOBER97--THE MESSAGE CAME! IN MY HEAD IS A CONSTANT LITANY OF GIBBERISH THAT COMES OUT SOMETHING LIKE MLK JR'S "FREE AT LAST" SPEECH TO THE TUNE OF THE THEME TO THE SUPERMAN CARTOON. SOON AND VERY SOON. WE HIT SAN FRAN IN THREE DAYS--CAN I CHECK OUT THAT FAST?
And I was out. After a brief vacation with Jan and Ma'at (who came up) I returned to San Diego. Time passed. I worked unhappy jobs, put off my return to school, and moved a lot.
In fall of '99 I finally started school at Mesa College, with a mind to becoming an English Teacher. In January of '00 I met Tony. In May/June of '00 I returned to Maine for a very eventful time, and now I work on my deck, this website, and school. Who knows where I'll end up?
--S.
[some of the following links are "under Construction" (read: "not finished yet"), but stay tuned for more!]
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